Play Is a Nutrient—Not a Nice-to-Have

One of my podcast guests said something the other day that was FASCINATING to me, and I wanted to share it here. “Play is a Nutrient”. 

BOOM!

Play is not an indulgence.
Play is not the reward.
Play is the work of childhood. And, by the way, it's critical for brain development.

When we treat play like it's something "extra" we’re actually starving our children’s developing brains of what they need most to grow, learn, and thrive.

The Brain Grows by Playing

Did you know that by the time a child turns three, their brain is already about 80% developed? And by five, that number jumps to 90%.

That doesn’t mean your preschooler should be working on long division. It means that during those early years, their brain is wildly busy building the connections between brain cells that form the foundation for everything from emotional regulation to critical thinking.

And how do those synapses get built?
From play.

Every time a toddler stacks blocks, or a preschooler invents a story with stuffed animals, or a kindergartner turns a stick into a magic wand, they’re creating and strengthening brain pathways. They’re experimenting, exploring, and learning in the deepest, most meaningful way possible.

Early Play Isn’t Just for Toddlers

By the time our kids get to school age, it’s easy to feel the pressure to "get serious." But guess what? That brain development isn’t done. Even into the teenage years, the brain is pruning old connections and wiring new ones. And play (yes, even for older kids) is still one of the best ways to support that process.

For your 10-year-old, “play” might look like building LEGOs, writing a comic book, or staging a backyard soccer tournament. For your teen, it might mean making memes, learning TikTok dances, or role-playing in a D&D campaign. (Yes, I’m completely serious…playfully so, but serious.)

If it’s internally motivated, creatively rich, and brings joy, it’s play.

And here’s the kicker: that kind of play supports executive functioning, problem solving, empathy, and emotional regulation. Are those all the things we want for our kids?

(Side note: adults who know how to play have richer, happier, more fulfilled lives)

Actionable Ideas for Parents

1. Protect Free Play Time.
   If your child’s day is packed with structured activities, consider scaling back to give them time to engage in unstructured, self-directed play. Free play builds independence, creativity, and problem-solving skills. We’re talking 1-2 hours per day if you can. If your kiddo can’t yet handle unstructured play, combine this strategy with #2 below.

2. Join the Play (Without Taking Over).
   Get on the floor and follow your child’s lead. Let them be the boss. If your child wants you to pretend to be the baby dinosaur and eat imaginary soup off a rock, just do it (and don’t feel like you need to turn that scenario into a learning opportunity: they’re already learning). You’re not just “playing”. You’re building your relationship and giving their developing brain the rich input it needs.

But What About "Real Life"?

Yes, really life. There’s dinner to make, homework to finish, laundry to fold. And honestly, sometimes you’d rather have a root canal than build another Lego set.

But here’s what I want to offer you: Play doesn’t have to be big, or performative, or Pinterest-worthy. It can be five minutes of silliness at the breakfast table. A dance party in the kitchen. A story you make up together in the carpool line.

Think of play like Vitamin D. A little bit every day makes a huge difference.

The Long-Term Payoff

When we nourish our kids’ brains with play (especially in the early years) we’re making deposits into a lifelong account of creativity and connection.

We’re also reinforcing the message that learning isn’t necessarily about performance. It’s about curiosity, exploration, and joy.

So whenever you can - say yes to the mud pies, the cardboard forts, the made-up games that make no sense to anyone but your kid. It’s not a waste of time, or even optional.

It’s the whole point.